


Face the Sunshine

by EmmaLikesTheInternet



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Camp Infirmary, Campfire, Canon verse, Coming Out, Flirting, Hades is an alright dad, Insecurities, Internalised Homophobia, Jason is the mum friend, Kissing, Monsters, Multi, Nico has Issues but so does everyone, Pining, Piper Is Really Great (tm), Piper the Wingman, Sarcastic!Nico, Stubborn!Will, Vivid nightmares, and also a big ol' wally, but life is angsty bitch, camp banter, fluff is only sweet after angst, its a bit angsty, lighter than it sounds holy shit, love can't save you but it helps if your boyf has medical experience, mental health, quite sweary, this shit making it sound angsty as hell
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-01
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-09 21:42:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11677656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmmaLikesTheInternet/pseuds/EmmaLikesTheInternet
Summary: Nico di Angelo shakes in the night and Will Solace is smarter than he looks.They should probably kiss each other, but that's their own business.





	1. but you always hold your head up high//cause it's a long long long way down

**Author's Note:**

> Work title: based off a Walt Whitman quote ("keep your face toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you") because I hate myself.
> 
> Chapter Title: lyric from This River is Wild by the Killers. I might make a playlist for this fic, but go listen to it asap. Love yourself, please.
> 
> This is set in the canon universe, between Blood of Olympus and Trials of Apollo. It's not technically a three-day-infirmary fic, but it's pretty similar. just how I think it went down
> 
> Hope you enjoy!!

“Nico! Nico di Angelo, look me in the eye, you coward!”

Nico screwed his eyes, tighter, tighter. Just a few more seconds, just stay strong for a few more seconds and she’ll be gone, she’ll leave you alone-

“Nico.”

Her voice was softer now. Quiet, and gentle. When it was like this…gods, it was so familiar! Comforting! Like a lullaby to a screechy baby, like reaching home in the midst of a storm.

“Bianca?” His voice wavered, breaking before he could force it out of his throat. “Bianca, won’t you just leave me alone?”

“Come on Nico.” Soft, smooth, again. “It’s me, I promise. Just open your eyes. It’s easy!”

He shook his head, feeling like a child. It was cold, this place was so very cold. He was shivering.

“Di Angelo! Look me in the eye!” He flinched. “What, are you trying to displease me?”

Nico waited for the wave of nausea to pass, before reluctantly doing as he were bid. 

And right there, in front of him, stood his sister. Her, yes, her. One breath, two breath, long blink, still Bianca. Right there. Close enough to touch.

“Bianca,” He said tonelessly. His mouth felt stuffed with cotton wool, and he was shaking, as if the lone word pained him. It did.

“Oh, Nico, I knew you could do it,” she laughed, but it wasn’t really Bianca’s laugh. Too short, too harsh. Bianca? “Took you long enough.”

Come to think of it, could it really be Bianca? As Nico looked, he noticed…details. Everything was a little out of place, as if she were Frankenstein’s monster, a jigsaw of stolen body parts, of somebody else’s memories.

The girl regarded him harshly, and, as she stood, she began to look less and less like his sister; nose was too long; her teeth were sharp; skin was sickly; and her eyes-

Nico screwed his own eyes shut, tightly, because he didn’t want to know. Pretending, pretending. “Bianca? Won’t you take me away from here?” Pretending, because it was far easier. 

“Anything for you, dear brother.” That voice, even Bianca’s voice didn’t sound like Bianca’s voice!

Nico took a breath. In, out. In, out. It was as if all the instincts within him had been triggered at once, and every atom of his being was tearing itself apart, and he just wanted it all to STOP. 

“Open your eyes, fool! Look upon your _dearest_ sister!” Bianca’s voice was dripping with spite, making Nico flinch. Softer, she tried again. “Nico, c’mon. I have friends for you. Our sisters and brothers! Won’t you look upon me, take my hand and greet them?”

Nico was shaking, with effort, with fear. With cold.

“Come on then, Nico di Angelo. Open your eyes! Aren’t you supposed to be a hero? Left me for dead, to save the world!”

“Please,” he sobbed. “Please just let me go, Bianca.”

A skeletal hand gripped his wrist. “Choose your path, di Angelo. Will you be the hated hero for all your life, or will you leave them all behind and take your true place?” Her face was swimming in the inky black of his closed lids. Not Bianca. Not Bianca. “Answer me, monster!”

“Not Bianca!” he gasped, barely. 

The thing chuckled. “Have I changed? Or have you changed, Nico?”

His eyes were tore open to reveal masses of darkness, armies of cruel, despicable monsters, teeming behind the grotesque image of what maybe once was his sister. “Son of Hades, I present to you!” It gestured elaborately to all the monsters. “Your brothers and sisters!”

They loomed and leered, and Nico screamed silently, begging for mercy, to be spared, all while Bianca’s laugh echoed in his ears.

The next thing Nico di Angelo did was turn over in his sweat-soaked bed, and vomit onto the floor.

-

The camper on watch wasn’t delighted, but certainly wasn’t surprised, to see Nico di Angelo stumble towards him in a fluffy skull dressing gown during the early hours of dawn. Nico was aware he looked like absolute hell, but it probably wasn’t the worst thing the lookout had seen.

He gave Nico a complaisant smile. It was probably meant to be comforting, but Nico just felt pretty guilty. “Need another cleaning harpy?”

Nico grimaced. “Sorry.”

He shrugged, rubbing his jaw. “It’s no bother. You get some sleep, alright- Nico, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah. Nico, Son of…” For some reason, the bitter words just couldn’t force their way out. “Well. It’s not exactly hard to figure out.”

“Yeah, it’s a lovely dressing gown. I’m Jamie. Demeter. You talked to the medics yet?” 

Nico lowered his eyes. “About what?”

“I don’t know how to put this delicately, but I do talk to the others on duty, you know.” Nico didn’t respond. “Look, this is the third time this week you’ve sought a cleaning harpy in the dead of the night. Either you’ve been having some wild secret parties, or you ought to be in the infirmary.”

“I should be getting back,” said Nico.

The boy sighed. “Look, I’ll walk you back, it’s on the way. The harpy should take about five minutes from there.”

Nico nodded, and they walked in silence.

The sky was dawn-grey. You know the kind; intense and not-quite-right. As if the gods were trying to tell you to sleep again, sleep, you shouldn’t be here, you shouldn’t see ugly skies like these. Yeah, it reminded Nico of long journeys; when you wake up early, to set off in good time, and the sky is so, so grey, greyer than headaches.

They reached Nico’s cabin door, and Nico came to a standstill, eager to leave the company but not sure what was expected of him.

“Here you are. I’ll say it again; get some rest. Take care of yourself.” Nico squirmed. “Nico, I mean it. Talk to somebody.”

“Thank you,” he mumbled. “For taking me back.”

The boy touched his arm, and gently closed the door.

The cabin smelt; not even of vomit, but of acid. He could taste it, making him want to retch again.

He hopped onto the top bunk. He never slept on the top bunk; too high, made him feel exposed. But the bottom was covered in sweat and a tiny bit of vomit. An illness.

Hazel had used bedding from the bunk (it was better than a silk-lined coffin), and it still smelt like her, very faintly. Nico let his eyes fall closed and his head fill with grey.

Things were easier when Hazel was here. She was no miracle cure, but Hazel (and Reyna, at times) acted as an anchor to the faint yet comforting reality of camp. They were ties to a world he never belonged in; but, in order to keep up the illusion of sanity, that was good enough for him.

Nico felt separate. Plagued by nightmares and doubts, without the danger of quests to distract him- who knows what he could take? After all, it felt as if he were drifting away. It always had! He always felt that way!

But no, he’d have to keep on living. Tuck it away for another time. If there was anything Nico was good at, it was getting on with things.  
The cleaning harpy made him start, and he lay down steadily, ready for an extra few hours to toss and turn until he returned to his world of grey.

–

“Look Nico, no offence intended, but you looked like death warmed over.”

He snorted at Piper’s word choice. “It happens, on sunny days.”

He wasn’t in the mood for people interrogating him. He wasn’t in the mood for _people_ per say, but it was hard to avoid them, when your only excuse for a home was a summer camp.

No, it wouldn’t make a half-bad home. Nico remembered; hazily; his first days at Camp Half-Blood. He remembered the feeling of the sun, he remembered the Hermes cabin, he remembered days of play and blossoming friendships, he remembered believing he would grow into the heroes he rubbed shoulders with.

One day, he woke up, wrapped in a sleeping bag, on a hollowed, wooden floor, with a feeling of dread and emptiness and a grotesque closure; a feeling he still, still hadn’t managed to shake.

That had been Bianca, and since, Camp Half Blood was ghosted. Mere potential. Could-have-beens.

Jason was seeing how many grapes he could stuff up his nose, while some kid from Dionysus looked on despairingly. Yeah, it was Nico’s favourite kind of could-have-been.

But not home.

“You can always talk to Auntie Jason, Mr Death,” said Jason, but he had about ten grapes up his nose.

“What? Didn’t quite catch that, Jason.” Piper giggled at Jason’s improvised game of Charades.

The whole table system had gone to complete shit ever since the Romans; it was a free-for-all once the conch sounded, with people sharing seats, sitting on the floor, shoving, just to ensure they were with their friends. Nico liked this system better.

“Listen Jason, one more grape and you’ll split your nose open. And we can’t head off for New Rome tonight if you haven’t got a nose, idiot.”

“Yeah Jason. You’ll notice Romans tend to have noses.”

“That is discrimination!” declared Jason, but nobody could understand him. In frustration, he stuffed another up, which was a mistake.

“Shit, Nico, I think he hurt himself.” They both dissolved into snickers, while Jason gave them the stink-eye.

“Oh no, Piper, we ought to take him to the infirmary, he’s bleeding! Oh wait. That’s grape juice.” And they were gone again.

Jason buried his head in his hands.

Eventually, the onlooker from Dionysius took pity on him, and an embarrassed Jason was whisked off to the infirmary, flanked by Piper and Nico, tittering.

“You’ll be alright, won’t you, Nico?”

“What?”

Piper played with her hair. “When we go New Rome, I mean. I don’t want you to feel lonely.”

Nico had forgotten. He allowed himself to get carried away, all the time, in… _this._ Camp. It was sunny, bubbly, good, he knew; but it didn’t belong to him.

It could’ve. Once upon a time, he could have been like Piper and Jason, grown to be strong and beautiful alike. But. He didn’t; instead he was Hades’ only son, instead he was destructive and cruel and terrifying. It could’ve been his; but he couldn’t indulge, selfishly corrupt it for everyone else.

Besides, he stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Of course I’ll be alright! Don’t be silly.”

“Exactly! Nico’ll have me.”

The voice belonged to a certain sunshiny medic, stood there with the complete chilled-blue-eyes-just-rolled-out-of-bed-I-wear-this-stethoscope-for-fun look. Will Solace.

Piper thwacked him. “Did your mother ever teach you not to eavesdrop?”

“Ow! Did yours ever teach you not to hit?”

“When you’re the goddess of beauty, you needn’t concern yourself with matters so trivial.” Piper did a hair flick and simpered, which, though Nico had never met Aphrodite (thankfully), seemed a flawless impression.

Will laughed. “Touché. Jason will live, in case anybody was concerned. He’s very good at the whole grape-stuffing game; I was quite impressed. But, he’s lucky I had Lou-Ellen on hand to perform a simple summoning spell, otherwise it’d be an operation.”

“Accio grape!” suggested Nico.

“Along the lines of, yes.” Will laughed. It was nice.

The conch horn sounded for the end of breakfast. A patient shot up from bed yelling ‘breakfast’, and Will rushed to help out.

“We should probably get going soon, activities will be starting. See you at lunch, yeah?”

Nico scratched his neck. “Yeah, about that. I’ve booked sword fighting over our lunchbreak again. Sorry.”

“You twat.” Piper gave him a big hug, while he squirmed.

“Have fun in New Rome, okay? Find leads on Leo, say hello to Reyna and Frank, send Hazel hugs. Oh, and when you pass through Manhattan, tell Percy and Annabeth that I hope they’re enjoying the sex away from camp.”

Piper looked scandalised. “You can’t say that, Nico. You’re, what, five?”

Nico eyerolled.

“Oh, I’m gonna miss you so much!” Nico dodged another hug. “Make sure you Iris-message every day. Twice every day. Three times! Actually, why don’t we just have an ongoing Iris message? I can hire someone to make a constant rainbow. A fireman, a pride parade, I don’t know. Oh, how will we cope without you?”

This caught him by surprise. Her tone was jokey, but not cruel. She looked at him, eyes glistening, as if to say ‘of course!’

“I’m sure you’ll scrape by.”

“Don’t forget to say bye to Jason, I don’t want him throwing a toddler-tantrum on the bus.”

“Okay. I’ll nab a few seconds before I head off. You coming?”

“No, I have French class, and it’s embarrassing turning up late when you’re the teacher.”

Nico studied his shoes. “See you, then.”

Piper wrapped her arms around him again, and he refrained from the lamppost impression this time. She squeezed and pecked his cheek.

“Ew. Sticky.” She had been experimenting with brightly coloured lipsticks, lately; today was bubblegum pink, set off with a khaki jacket, and Christ- Hercules?- she was stunning. Nico would say a girl like Piper could turn him straight, but he didn’t want to think like that. So he didn’t. 

“Sorry,” she smirked. “I’ll miss you, Nico, I mean it. We both will. Now go give my boyfriend some goodbye kisses or whatever.” She waved, gave a tiny smile, and whirled off.

Piper had come a long way. She had rejected who she was for forever; ran from beauty, ran from love. But now she gave love freely, and now she wore bubblegum lipstick. Maybe Nico could learn from that, but, again, he didn’t want to think too hard about it…so he didn’t.

“Hiya, Jason. How’s the nose?”

“It hurts like an enraged harpy, thank you, Nico, but I’ll be okay.”

“A crying shame.”

Jason stuck his tongue out. “Are you here just to insult me and my poor nose?”

“I won’t see you at lunch, I booked sword-fighting.”

“Twat!”

“Hey, that’s exactly what Piper said, you know.”

Jason chuckled, then turned to Nico with the afterthought of a frown. “I’ll miss you, a lot, Nico.”

“Sure,” replied Nico, vaguely.

Jason let concern flicker across his face. “Look after him, yeah, Will?”

Will finger-gunned while Nico made a face. “Jason, I’m the Prince of the Underworld. I’ve been to Tartarus, almost died in a jar, and shadow-travelled a stupid statue halfway around the globe. I can look after myself!”

“Sure.” Jason was mocking him. Nico rewarded him with a thwack.

“I’m serious.” Jason waited ‘til the attention of the ward was elsewhere. “I worry about you. All the time.”

“You’re the one in the infirmary bed.”

Jason smiled gently, knowing he wouldn’t get anywhere with Nico. Not now.

“Have fun in New Rome. Find some fiery demigods. Spend time with your girlfriend. Whatever you heroes do on the weekend.”

“Thanks, man. Now you have fun too, you’re a big boy now. Make lots of friends while I’m gone and if you feel sick tell Chiron and I’ll come pick you up, alright, sweetie?” Jason squished his cheeks, which Nico should probably have objected to.

“God, Mom, you’re such an embarrassment.” His voice was lighter than normal.

“Hmm, what do heroes do on the weekend?” Jason looked right at him, and it made Nico squirm away from the piercing blue of the eye contact.

“Put grapes in their nose.”

“Hey!” Nico aimed a withering stare Will’s direction. “Quit eavesdropping!”

Will made a face, and Nico ignored how his pulse sped up.

Jason beckoned him closer and made a show of whispering into his ear; “Will’s cute.”

Nico mockingly cupped a hand around Jason’s ear. “Jason’s straight.”

The two’s run-in with Cupid felt like aeons ago. They hadn’t talked about it; they hadn’t dared; but, for some reason, Nico didn’t feel weird, joking this way with Jason. It was taboo; it should be!

But if there was anything he’d learnt, it’s that times had changed. And he and Jason had changed. Jason no longer regarded him with a shoddily disguised fear; they were, gods forbid, friends.

The war had ended, and they had carried on living.

“Hey! Don’t make such sweeping assumptions!”

“Alright, Mr All-American, anything you want to be telling me? After all,” he put on a gravelly, dramatic voice, “It is a costly thing, looking on the true face of Love.”

Jason looked at Nico in shock, then barked out a laugh. “Sorry, Nico. It’s just, you never fail to surprise me.”

Nico smiled grimly. “I could’ve done it, you know.”

“Huh?”

“I mean. I could’ve come out. Told everyone, told you, in my own time. It feels too late now.” His gut was twisting and he hated it.

“Nico. It’s not too late.”

“I told Percy. Before they left.”

Jason looked surprised. “I didn’t know.”

“I could’ve done it.” Nico swallowed the nasty taste in his mouth. He felt shitty, shitty, shitty, and out of place in the lively infirmary.

“I know. I know. I believe you.”

–

_Slice. Stab. Feign. Slash. Repeat._

Nico was tearing his way through dummy after dummy, working them in a circle with the repetitive, soothing sequence.

_Slice_

The sun was burning hot, searing, on his back, and his sword had a familiar sort of weight about it. It was good, here was good. Here was fine.

_Stab_

He ignored the weird loneliness that bubbled up from his gut. He ignored the ache of his limbs telling him to put down the sword, and he ignored the tattered state of the practice dummies from hours of relentless attack. He ignored the fact he wanted to throw up.

_Feign_

Yeah, it wasn’t challenging him. But it felt familiar. It felt good to focus on nothing but the way his sword moved, as if an independent creature Nico had merely befriended. It felt meticulous and easier than allowing the clamour in his mind to leak through. It felt good to hurt.

_Slash_

Yeah, this was easy. Him and his sword. All he ever wanted was peace.

_And, repeat_

“Hey.”

A gentle voice sounded from behind him. Nico startled, but lowered his sword. “Will.”

“You’ve been practicing for hours now. Don’t you want a break?”

“No, not really.”

Will’s face softened into a smile. It was like, he didn’t ever have to move the muscles in his face to smile. Whenever he smiled, it was like his features were simply melting into their natural state. It was a smile that belonged.

“Rhetorical question. Put the sword down.”

Nico did as bid, reluctant, and Will shuffled his feet in the silence. “I talked to Jamie.”

So that’s why he looked so awkward. “I don’t know a Jamie.” Nico didn’t know why he was lying. It rolled off his tongue. Like lying was the natural state of his mouth.

Will gave him a funny look. “He said you’d been having nightmares. You told me you had power over dreams.”

“Yeah. I used to.”

“You should’ve talked to me.”

Nico said nothing.

“Come to the infirmary, yeah? Help me out for a few hours. After last night’s _delightful_ parting game of Capture the Flag, we could use all the spare hands to see the Camp into next week!” His voice was gentle. It carried no weight.

“Next week, and the next game.” Will’s eyes twinkled as he laughed.

From his three days in the infirmary, after the war, Nico had learnt that Will had the most ridiculous, obnoxious laugh on the face of the planet. It was loud enough to be heard rooms away, and horrendous, too; like a pained donkey.

But, it bubbled up and over straight from Will’s heart.

“C’mon, Corpse Breath.”

“Hey!”

Nico subsequently felt a bit less alone. Just a bit.

-

The infirmary could only be described as utter chaos. Chaos he would liken to his own mind, if it weren’t so bright and lively.

“I swear to my father’s damned name, I hate Capture the Flag with every atom of my mortal body, and I can’t wait for the school year.”

Nico snickered at Will’s furrowed brows. They were darker than the rest of his hair. Nico wondered if, under the sun-bleached curls, his roots were that dark.

Shaking himself, he had to supress the urge to check.

“Are you going…home? For the year?”

Will’s smile stiffened a bit. “No, as it happens. I’m just excited for half the camp to go. Half the camp means half the patients.” Will wrinkled his freckled nose. “Well. Dad chose to give me this instead of music or archery or whatever, and that’s that.”

“Who knows how many lives you’ve saved, Will?”

It was the right thing to say. Will beamed, his face cracked into two.

“It’s music, if you listen close enough. You can lose yourself in quiet, but also in noise.”

“Music?”

“C’mon, emo boy, can’t you hear it?” Will started to do some kind of interpretive dance that had Nico doubled over and begging for mercy.

More smiles flickered across Will’s lips. “Into chaos we descend.” Nico hesitated at the door. “What? You a vampire or something? Need me to invite you in?”

Nico shook his head despondently. “Are you sure you, uh-“ Nico pushed that sickly insecure feeling back down to the void it came from.

“I want you around, Nico, don’t look at me like that. _C’mon with me._ I’m not leaving you behind.”

A hand, on his. Will kept- was keeping- his promise.

“So,” said Will, once they were inside, “this is Harry.” Harry was a boy of about 10 years old, hair dark brown and sticky-up, and leg in a doodled-on cast. “Harry is a son of Nike. Harry shattered his bone whilst playing Capture the Flag, because he thought jumping out of a pine tree and onto the opposing team was the best idea since sliced bread.”

“The diversion won us the game,” he muttered, grinning.

“This is Harry’s fifth visit to the infirmary.” Will gritted his teeth. “ _He’s only been here six weeks_.”

Harry gave the infuriated medic a toothy smile.

“Nico, I need you to go through the paperwork with him to ensure he can _go home and leave me in peace_ tomorrow, while I go change some bandages.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Sorry, it’s pretty straightforward, I just hate paperwork.”

“That’s okay, I hate bandaging up bloody, pussy wounds.” Will gave him a grateful smile and went to fetch the paperwork.

“You’re Nico, huh?”

“Yeah,” he confirmed with a grimace. “Son of Hades.”

Harry’s face lit up. “That’s so cool!”

“Um?”

“You got that huge Athena statue here, right? And like, won the war against Gaia?”

“I don’t think I quite won-“

“My sister, Lilly, says you use shadows as portals. She’s probably lying, but, uh, how did you get it here?”

“Um, I guess I did use shadows as portals. It’s called shadow-travelling.”

The kid’s face lit up. “That’s amazing! And you did that all by yourself?”

“I had some friends with me.”

“Goat dude and scary Roman girl, right?” Nico nodded. Reyna would love that. “Can they shadow-travel too?”

“No. I did the shadow-travelling, and they-“

“So you did do it by yourself?”

“Um, Reyna lent me-“

“You’re downplaying yourself.” The boy blushed. “Sorry. It’s just, you’re so cool.”

This was weird. But Nico didn’t have to think about it, or anything right now. Right now, he needed to help a kid out.

Nico blushed back. “Thank you,” he said. “Hey, tell me about that jumping out of a tree. Don’t tell Will I said this, but it sounds totally awesome.”

-

Once Harry’s paperwork was done, he set off to find Will, but said son of Apollo found him before he had a chance.

“Lunch?”

“Sure.”

Will stripped off the overalls, chucking them into a laundry basket. He disposed of the gloves and washed his hands, before turning back excitedly to Nico.

His hair was all mussed from pulling off the overalls. Without them, he looked so much _better_ ; denim shorts, cut off above the knee; well-loved camp T-shirt, making his eyes pop; short-sleeved flannel, which clashed _horribly_ with his outfit; scuffy high-tops, not quite obscuring mismatched socks.

He ran a self-conscious hand through his perpetually messy hair. His lips were pink and swollen, from being bitten out of concentration. His eyes were big; and blue, oh, so blue.

Nico blushed.

“Lunch,” Will repeated.

Nico studied the ground. “Not before you take off that flannel. It’s a sin to fashion.”

Will laughed; big, honking laugh; and lobbed it at the smaller boy’s head. “Whatever, Eros.”

“Will, I think you mean Aphrodite.”

Will frowned, evidently replaying the last few seconds, then a look of horror crossed his features. His face turned beetroot. He groaned. “Shit.”

Now they were both blushing, and Nico thought that fair.

“Oh my gods, seriously, I was just tryna think of a male alternative to Aphrodite, I swear, and-“

“Will,” said Nico, voice breathy with humour, and also a bit of embarrassment.

“-I don’t know how we’re expected to keep up with all this bloody mythology, like, how am I supposed to remember every detail about the gods? And sometimes, I dunno, I forget because it’s so hard. I mean, I don’t even know most the things my goddamn father does, so-“

“WILL!” He stuttered to a silence. Nico found it interesting to hear Will ramble, as he never swore otherwise. He should embarrass the other demigod more. “I was promised lunch?”

“Yeah, yeah. Apollo cabin. C’mon.”

They arrived to find a cabin empty of all but one; a girl, only just younger than Will, playing a Ramones song on the electric guitar. Some completely unrelated house music blasted from a stereo, on the other side of the room.

“Jesus, Amelie, how do you play with that in the background?” exclaimed Will, turning it off. Amelie just smirked.

The Apollo cabin was washed a nice, warm yellow colour, with simple wooden bunks and white sheets. It wasn’t messy; rather, lived in, with pictures on the walls, rugs on the floors, teetering piles of books and loose paper pushed in corners. Each bunk was clearly owned, some with weapons on the pillow, or spare jumpers and muddy shoes shoved under the bed.

At the very end of the room, there was a massive CD rack and a bookshelf, either side of a small, splintery door. CD players, digital stereos, even a vintage gramophone, were perched on every available surface, as were potted plants that bloomed all different colours.

Will leaned down to whisper in Nico’s ear. “Kayla’s dating a dude from Demeter. He gives us plants like, all the time. It’s nice.”

Weirdly, Amelie’s guitar and the amp were the only instruments in the room. Nico had had the misfortune of witnessing the awful acoustic they used for campfire. It had been designed by Harley from Hephaestus, who was enthusiastic about colourful things, dragon stickers and fake blood. He ought to have picked just one to theme it around.

But, it was so garish, surely it should be somewhere in the cabin?

Nico still hadn’t figured out what this had to do with lunch. Maybe Will had to grab something from his bunk?

Will did. His was the one in the very middle of them all, and he didn’t share it; his stuff went on the bottom bunk, and himself on the top. He seemed to be hoarding supplies from the infirmary; there was a bandage wrapped around the bed pole.

His clothes were folded neatly. On the top bunk, there was a quilt- cute- and one of those old paperback poetry volumes, the kind you find in charity shops.

He grabbed a jumper. “Okay, let’s go.”

But, he was leading Nico to the other side of the room, to where Amelie stood, playing.

“The Ramones?” asked Nico, as a sort-of nod to her choice.

Amelie high-fived him and resumed without a hiccup.

Will unlocked the door. “Now, Nico, what you’re about to see is a secret that’s been guarded for generations of demigods. An ancient alliance, a symbiotic agreement between cabins. You must swear not to exploit this sacred knowledge for your own dastardly gain.”

“Um, okay?”

“Promise.”

“I promise.”

Will pushed on the door to reveal- a music room?

There was the elusive guitar, along with every musical instrument on the face of the planet. Flutes, trombones, horns. A drum kit, a double bass, a grand piano. Miscellaneous harmonicas, violas, violins alike; three saxes, lyres, a euphonium, a bassoon. Stacked amps, picks, drumsticks, tuning forks and spare strings. Every instrument imaginable, and then some, tucked under the Apollo cabin.

Nico’s jaw dropped. “Oh my gods.”

Will was bursting with excitement. “That’s not even the best part. Follow me.”

The two picked their way around the musical instruments towards a darkened passage at the end. Will flicked on a torch (where the Hades did that come from?) and illuminated the cobwebs and dust.

“You go first.” Nico didn’t like the dark, okay.

Will raised an eyebrow. “Never would’ve thought.” He gripped Nico’s hand and led him through.

They emerged blinking, into a kitchen.

“What?” Nico was just confused now.

Yeah, it was a proper kitchen, and definitely not the one he had dishwashing duty in. It was done up all modern and tasteful, with a sleek counter, cupboards and a fridge.

Sitting on the counter, swinging his legs and eating cereal, was none other than lookout Jamie.

“Lunch, Mr di Angelo.” Will buried his nose in a cupboard, looking for something edible.

“What the fuck,” Nico whispered.

Will grinned at him. “Sacred deal between Apollo and Demeter. We have access to each other’s secret rooms. And Hermes, too, actually. Only because they found out and demanded a part in the deal on pain of telling Chiron.”

Nico laughed. “What do Hermes provide?”

“Oh, anything. Most my pharmaceutical supplies, for starters. Now, what do you fancy?”

Jamie put down his bowl, opening a sliding door. “We have a lot of cereal. Demeter drops by with gifts, sometimes.”

Nico shuddered. “I spend the majority of the Battle of Manhattan in the Underworld, twelve years old, nursing a lot of fear and heartbreak, trying to convince my father, lord of the dead, to not abandon Olympus and all the demigods to fate. All the while, being coerced into eating cereal by your mother.” Nico took a breath. “Kinda ruined it for me, sorry.”

Jamie threw his head back and laughed.

“Ham sandwich? Jam sandwich? Salad? Coffee?”

“If you’re making sandwiches, I’d like a ham, please. And where’s the coffee machine?”

Jamie jumped off the counter, nimble. “I’ll help you out.”

“You want coffee, Will?”

Nico couldn’t read his facial expression. “No thank you, Nico.”

He turned to Jamie. “I won’t lie to you, I don’t really know how to use a coffee machine.”

Jamie laughed again, neck exposed. “Let me.” He leaned over Nico and fiddled with the workings. “How do you like your coffee, babe?”

Nico blushed. “Black, two sugars, please.”

“Uh huh.” He swayed his hips as he worked.

Nico checked behind him, making sure Will was absorbed in his task. “Will said you told him I had a nightmare. How did- how did you know it was a nightmare?”

Jamie was so different in the day. He was like an Apollo kid, in that sense; he just seemed perkier, seemed to have a light about him.

Demeter was the goddess of farming, and plants needed sunlight to thrive. It made sense.

It felt like, Demeter and Apollo were the finest of society. No wonder they had this partnership. Demeter blessed the land with substance, and hard work. Apollo blessed the people with appreciation of what they had. With art.

Like, Demeter made the flowers grow, and Apollo wrote poems about them.

That was where Will was different. He was more hardworking than any Demeter kid. He laboured like the traditional farmers.

He was not a god on a pedestal, the fine art of Apollo. He did not create beauty, he fought in its name. He _saved_ people.

Jamie stirred his coffee, and Nico cursed his brain for wandering back to Will. He had to focus on the boy in front of him. 

“Clovis owed me a favour.”

“What?”

“You asked me how I knew it was a nightmare.”

“You...asked after me?”

“Yeah.” Jamie handed him a steaming mug, and Nico thanked him. “Why wouldn’t I?”

Nico blinked, just as Will appeared by his shoulder, brandishing some bread. “Sandwich!” His smile was bright, but a little off-kilter. Somehow.

“Well, we best be off, right Will?” Will exhaled. Relief?

“Yep. Lots of infirmary duty for this one! You still okay with helping me out, right?”

Will seemed…insecure. “Of course.”

Jamie went over to wash his bowl in the sink. “Nice seeing the both of you!”

Nico watched him, chewing the ham sandwich thoughtfully. Jamie turned around, watching him right back.

Jamie took a sip of his coffee, not breaking eye contact. His expression was unreadable. Sort of worried, but also quizzical, but also…hungry?

“Um, did you want some sandwich?”

He blinked. “Cheers, but I’m vegetarian.”

“Okay. Well, see you.”

“See you.”

Once the kitchen was out of earshot, Nico turned to Will. “Jamie’s different in the daytime, huh.”

-

The rest of the day passed in a blur, and it was good. It distracted him from everything.

Working in the infirmary, he forgot everything else. He didn’t notice he was still trailing Will’s ugly flannel along on his arm until a patient pointed it out, much to his embarrassment.

He got why Will liked it so much. You could lose yourself in kindness and help everyone else.

After the day in the infirmary, his brain seemed a little quieter. He could sit down without feeling like he was bubbling over. He could sort through his thoughts in peace.

Firstly, the morning. Will hadn’t pushed it, which surprised him.

Will was a pushy person, because he had to be. Heroes, they tend to insist that they’re fine, and it was his job as a medic to find the problem. By being pushy and infuriating and irritating and brilliant.

Maybe Will saw that Nico was cracked all the way through. Maybe he didn’t want Nico making a mess on his doorstep, or whatever. He didn’t want to deal with Nico.

Or maybe, he knew Nico had his guard up. Maybe he wanted to give Nico a change to clear his head and think about getting treatment himself. And it worked, didn’t it?

Maybe Will knew Nico. Maybe Will cared.

Nico didn’t know why Will caring about him was such a bizarre concept. Nico was sort of used to being abandoned, is all.

Yeah, Nico didn’t think too much of himself, because he was always being left behind. But Will; Will had whisked him away to the infirmary, shown him the weird and wonderful of camp, stupid heroes almost getting killed. Will had led him by the hand through sworn-to-secrecy passages, made him a ham sandwich, cracked jokes to cheer him up.

Will had seen Nico, listened to the sound of him thinking, and _known_ what he needed.

It had been a nice day.

Maybe he was just a patient, and Will was the best doctor in the world. Or maybe-

Well, evidence stacked up to suggest Will cared. Nico tried to swallow that.

The campfire blazed, it lit up warm and cheery faces around it. People, shoulder to shoulder, saying goodbyes, making the last memories of the summer. Crying. Kissing. Shadows, dancing.

“Hey, look, it’s my favourite ghost boy!” Will was grinning. In the light, he looked- new. Beautiful. Alive. Something like that. _Dammit_.

“My siblings kicked me out, ‘cause apparently I’m bad at singing. Dunno where they got that idea. God, I love the last campfire of the summer, it’s always the best,” Will continued. “Then I thought, hey, it’s not all bad! I know who’ll be lurking in the corners, looking emo, longing for some hot chocolate!”

Like the saint he was, he handed Nico a steaming cup, and Nico murmured gratefully. Autumn was closing around them, and it was sure a relief to have something to warm him up.

“Will, I wanted to talk.”

“Standing in the shadows isn’t the regular way to initiate a conversation, but, go ahead.”

Nico looked at his smile, his lit up face, his twinkling eyes. The shadows danced, as they do.

But, before he could open his eyes, the air in front of the two of them shimmered.

“An Iris message!” said Will.

Piper’s face flickered into existence, squinting at them. “Hello? Hello? Is this thing working?”

Nico couldn’t help the smile that split across his face. Honest, he couldn’t. “Piper!”

“Heya, Neeks! You didn’t think you’d get away that easily, did you?”

Nico looked at the floor. “I didn’t think you were serious.”

“Hey! We all need a bit of Nico time!” yelled Percy, crashing into frame. “Hey Will! Nice job on Jason’s nose!”

Will saluted. Nico thought it was cute, which pissed him off.

“You arrived safe, then, right?”

Piper snorted. “Oh my gods, it was the funniest. We were at Burger King-“

“Ew.”

“Shut it, di Angelo. And some _dracaenae_ were terrorising some poor kid and her satyr. I rocked up and they were all like ‘hiss hiss puny mortal girl think you can even touch us-‘“

“And then Pipes just totally ran them through with her dagger and it was the baddest shit I’ve seen in my life and I love her!” Jason exclaimed. Will awwwed.

“That’s- bless, Jason’s glorifying it, but you should’ve seen the look on that poor kid’s face. She was terrified! I bought her a burger.”

“Look at the heroes, having fun while we slave away in the infirmary.”

Will looked outraged. “One afternoon! He’s been helping for barely an afternoon! You know how long I’ve been slaving away in that place? Five years! I ran a field hospital when I was twelve!”

“I led an army of the dead when I was twelve.”

Will hit him.

Nico wasn’t liking the expression forming on Piper’s face, so he changed the subject. “How’s Manhattan? Missing camp?”

Annabeth smiled. “Yeah, but, shit, Percy’s mom bakes the best cookies I’ve ever tasted. Personally, I’m never leaving.”

“And now we’re gonna have a giant sleepover and destress and Piper’s got me a facemask and we wish you were here, Nico!” Percy was grinning and he looked like a fucking puppy, dammit.

“No thanks. Piper’s gloopy skincare stuff is scary.”

“Facemasks are clinically proven to make your skin healthier, and your skin is one of the most vital organs in your body,” said Will, matter-of-factly.

“He’s right,” added Annabeth. “Skincare is incredibly important.”

“Calm your fragile masculinity, babe. They come recommended my brother.”

Jason lowered his voice. “Pipes, no offence, but your brother’s pretty damn camp.”

“You don’t even know which one I’m talking about!”

“You don’t need to know.” Piper scowled at him.

Will was clearly trying not to laugh. “Well, the whole camp is missing you too. The year will be weird without all of you.”

“What have we missed, eh?”

-

They spent the good part of half an hour chatting with the four, Sally Jackson appearing to chat too at one point. (“Nico! You’ve grown up so much!”)

Will and Nico told stories of camp for Percy and Annabeth, from Will’s gory injury stories (“That sounds so much like Clarisse. Wait, don’t tell her I said that.”) to Nico’s first-hand prank experiences (“Where did they get live bats from?” “Percy, this is _the Stolls_ we’re talking about.”) and Will’s extensive knowledge of everybody’s love life (“Dammit, I was betting on at least another month. Five dollars poorer, thanks a bunch, Solace.” “Annabeth? Has anyone ever told you you’re full of surprises?”)

They then called over other people to catch up with the four, and, before very long, the campfire was forgotten.

“Yes! Kayla’s not looking, front row for me!” Will dragged Nico right to the front he’d been banished from, and they were so close, Nico could reach out and touch the flames.

They were kinda hypnotic.

He remembered Hestia. Seeing her, his first day, seeing her with Percy. He remembered Bianca, leaving him at camp. He remembered what home felt like, and what losing home felt like.

Will was roasting a marshmallow. “What did you want to talk about?”

Nico let his eyes focus on the fire, watery from the light, watery from the ash. “I want you to help. With my nightmares. If you can.”

There was a pause, and all Nico could hear was the flames, and all he could see was the blurred light.

Will ghosted his hand over Nico’s jaw, gently, oh-so-gently, turning his head so they were making eye contact. “I can’t make any promises. But I will do everything in my power. And I’m glad you’re seeking help, because that’s brave.”

“Brave?” Will let his hand fall to Nico’s shoulder, his collarbone.

“Yeah. Braver than leading an army of the dead.”

“What about running a field hospital as a child?”

Will wrinkled his nose, in laughter. “No. That’s braver, I think you’ll find.” Nico let his eyes crinkle. “But, Nico. You’ve given into hope. I know how hard that is.”

Nico exhaled. Will’s hand was warm.

“Hope is very brave. You’re getting there. You’ll get there. I promise.”

“You said no promises.”

“I lied.”

And maybe Nico was afraid for this moment to end. Maybe he didn’t want to go to sleep tonight, didn’t want to have to fight again. But he would.

“You haven’t been left behind. See?”

He swallowed. “Thank you, Will.”

Will dropped his eyes, and his eyelashes were dark against illuminated skin. Nico watched him, just for a moment, as he dropped his hand. Then he turned back to the fire.

The hearth roared with the brightest, richest flame, which was odd, because the singing had stopped and the campers had gone. All but two, shoulder to shoulder.

Doubtless, it had something to do with the warmth in the pit of Nico di Angelo’s belly. Who’d have thought?

-


	2. my mind goes sleepwalking//when i’m putting the world to right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title: Oliver's Army by Elvis Costello and the Attractions. Go on. Listen to the song. You know you want to.
> 
> This chapter is a bit nuts. Will is a supressed mess, Piper is better than you, Jamie is a Gay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy this slightly incoherent word vom?

Nico didn’t know if he was afraid of peace or afraid of war.

The forest was nothing but a muddy and distant blur. It was dusk, dawn, he couldn’t be sure, and somebody had set his body on fire, every cell, every nerve, screaming at him to _run_. 

Forward, forward. The flames were tearing him apart, a vengeful to-and-fro, as the forest faded into fog. He laughed, from a long-lost place. One foot, another foot, again and again and again until more than just the forest faded. Reality faded, or something, and he was alone.

One foot, another foot. Running was not living, but he felt alive.

Minos was there, and he didn’t know why. “What are you running from, hero?” The ghost was hovering in front of his face, darting from the corners of his eyes, too fast for even Nico. He felt like an illusion, like one of those light projections in Venice’s dusty cinema that jumped across the wall.

“You better be careful around the corner. This is war, after all.” Nico’s hands balled into fists, ‘til Minos faded, too. It didn’t matter.

You can’t go digging up the past when you’re on the move. Forward, forward.

Now, it felt like a tunnel, somewhere underground, made his eyes ache. The air was heavy, potent with something, diesel or machine grease or soot, man-made and suffocating.

He reached a hand out, touched the brick. It came back wet. Maybe the tunnel was getting smaller.

Around the corner, and he caught sight of a familiar face. “Reyna.”

The girl nodded in her grim sort of acknowledgement and Nico really, really couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. He missed this.

“Keep running, Nico.” All of a sudden. People were gathering behind him, an army for him to lead. He couldn’t quite see them; they were translucent, corner-of-the-eye; but he knew them. In spirit, or some bullshit like that. Whatever he meant, he felt a fierce and desperate sort of protection, for his army.

He was running just fine, when something, something made him trip. And he was sprawled on the cold concrete, legs pinned by something soft and warm and-

Reyna screamed. Nico had never heard her scream. He looked just in time to see a bullet rip through her body.

There was no sword in his scabbard.

And there was his army, faces of his acquaintances; friends?; crumpling into lifelessness as some invisible monster attacked.

Breathing raggedly, heart beating with a wild sort of confusion, he turned back to the mass that had him on the floor. The light was dim, murky, yet he could still make out an olive cap, a silvery parka ripped open and stained with dark blood.

She was smaller than him. Now.

Nico slipped his eyes closed as he felt, from someplace in his chest, all the fires behind him suffocate. And he felt it numbly.

Before he knew it, the air turned stale, and she- the corpse- melted into velvety shadows in his grasp.

“Open your eyes.” Minos. “Time has passed, and you missed it.”

The tunnel had turned into a battlefield. Limbs of soldiers were entwined in grotesque ways, and, if Nico didn’t quite look, they seemed simply a mass of faceless bodies, like, the shades of Asphodel, something Nico could see with a barely stomached apathy.

Humans were not born for apathy.

He caught sight of Reyna, at the front of the mass. Her dark her was spilt over concrete, her skin was wrinkled from decay. Once he’d seen Reyna, he couldn’t help seeing others, distorted faces. Decayed.

About a foot from Reyna, some squarish glasses were blackened. A messy braid that belonged to a curled-up corpse. Familiar green eyes, frozen, sickeningly. Blonde hair, curly, freckles on greyed faces. Dark, dark skin and light and frizzy hair, so tiny and young and-

Nico felt the barrier of shock burst, as the overwhelming stench of death hit him.

Even Coach Hedge was there, which made Nico saddest, because _damn_ those young heroes, dying romantically. Coach had a son, a _life_.

And he didn’t?

At first, Nico thought the floor giving out was just a shock thing, but then he looked down, and there was a fire, deep below, and he was reaching for his sword, and he was falling.

-

This time, Nico ended up falling from the very top bunk.

He was only sleeping there because it reminded him of Hazel. That was all. He hoped it might help, but apparently getting better wasn’t as easy as hoping.

And hoping was pretty damn difficult, as it stands.

The war- and, well, being a demigod in general- had left him some pretty fast instincts. He could hit the ground running; which came in handy when his _frequent_ post-shadow-travel naps were interrupted by monsters and stuff; but, it meant that he freaked out easily.

It was better than the volcano incident, but now he was pretzelled on a wooden floor, ankle twisted and gash in his leg staining the wood.

“Ugh,” said Nico.

The dream had his heart racing, throat a little too tight. His cheeks were damp. Anxiety dreams.

He lay on the ground, counted to 100. That wasn’t enough, so he counted to 100 again.

“Ugh,” he repeated, and eased himself to his feet. Hit the ground running.

-

Okay, so Jamie was on watch again, which struck Nico as a bit weird.

He questioned it, and Jamie gave him a guilty look. “My sister’s supposed to be on duty, but she’s got a sore throat. I don’t sleep much anyway, and if I brought it up officially, she would’ve kicked up a fuss.”

Nico studied him. His skin was caramel, his face sharper than his mother’s. There was a bruising purple beneath his dark eyes.

“That’s not healthy.”

“Don’t you lecture me, your entire left leg is covered in blood. How can I help you?” He made earnest eye contact. After a second, Nico dropped it.

Jamie grabbed his wrist and gave him a _look_. He smiled, a long smile, as a prompt.

“I need to get some bandages and disinfectant, without any of the Apollo cabin finding out.”

Jamie raised an eyebrow. “Hiding secrets? Not healthy.”

“Stop using my own words against me.” The Demeter boy got a look of mischief in his eye, and slipped his hand into Nico’s.

It took Nico by surprise, but, he didn’t mind, which probably took him by surprise even more.

They raced to the Demeter cabin, which smelt of plants and life and baked goods. Jamie raised a finger to his lips. The room was filled with sleeping figures, peaceful in the almost-light. So they tiptoed, to a door identical to the one in Apollo, and they were in the kitchen.

Jamie filled up the kettle, and flicked it. “It’ll boil once we’re back,” a flashed grin like a promise, and they were rushing into a new tunnel. Nico’s heart raced, in a good way.

It made sense when they emerged in another room, filled with all manner of supplies stacked impossibly; if he breathed wrong, everything would come crashing down. A lifetime supply of snack bars, cans of soup as if it were a bomb shelter. 

Jamie had no suck qualms, marching over to a pile and removing a box, like it was master-level Jenga. “Welcome to Hermes,” he said. “May I?”

It took a bit too long to figure out what he meant, but eventually, Nico was sat on a three-legged chair whilst Jamie knelt, cleaning his leg.

His hands were quick, and gentle, and too warm for this time of night.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he asked gently, removing a splinter with some tweezers.

“No.”

Jamie frowned a little, before opening his mouth to answer. Nico didn’t know what he would’ve said, though, because the door burst open.

There were the Stoll brothers, bedhead hair and mismatched pyjamas, flanked by the entire Hermes cabin in various states of undress. They took in the scene before them with narrowed, devilish eyes, older-brother type smiles spreading across their identically mischievous faces.

So, the biggest gossips of the camp were staring right at Nico, a boy knelt in front of him, during the dead of night.

Nico, in a rush of adrenaline, turned to Jamie. “I was promised coffee?”

Jamie smirked, the purple shadows even starker than before. “Oh, you bet.”

And they raced off, leaving a mass of baffled campers frowning and formulating as it just turned 3AM.

-

When Nico arrived at the Big House, Will was shaking.

“Hey, Will, what’s up?” Nico let his hand brush Will’s shoulder, only just. His lower lip was overworked, chapped and almost bleeding.

With a roll of his shoulder, Will let his head drop against the blue-washed wood. “I’m sorry if it’s not good enough.” His normally obnoxious volume was suppressed by an almost-silent fear. Almost.

“It’s okay, Will.” Nico couldn’t offer much comfort other than that, but he _tried_. And maybe that counted for something

Will’s mouth hardened into a thin line of determination, and Nico was, for once, glad to see that familiar stubbornness. Will would do it. “C’mon. It’s almost nine, let’s get this show on the road. This way, if you please, sir.”

Smiling quietly, he followed Will’s grand gesticulation. A worrying nag remained at the back of his head; couldn’t help but notice how Will had swooped from shaking with nerves, to pissing about.

He pushed it aside. For now.

Nico hadn’t been here for a while; it was the kid’s room. Camp kept it for the younger campers, helped them deal with the shock. He remembered, distantly, seeing the orientation film here.

It was filled with beanbags, blankets and a football table, similar to the rec room, and an accumulation of toys; complex Lego sets, action figures, vintage doll houses. An old tape was set up on a projector, and the blinds were down, making it all dark.

“I’ve got some snacks to bring in. Help me?” Nico nodded, and Will hauled in a huge plastic bag, handles strung out from bearing weight. Nico rushed over to lend a hand, and the bag made it about three steps before snapping. Will cursed quietly, holding his red-raw hands up to the light filtering from the door.

“Plastic bags are lethal,” Nico remarked, taking Will’s hand in his own to inspect.

Will smiled, and the other boy blushed, dropping his hand immediately. The son of Apollo went back to working it, picking at the skin, squishing the blistered bits.

“Hey, medic boy. Stop that.” His eyes were guilty and cast toward the ground, making Nico sigh. “Look at me. You’ll do well. You know what it feels like. You’re unlike other, mortal doctors. You feel everything alongside your patients, and I _know_ you’ll do the best you possibly can.”

Will’s laugh was shaky. “I wish you wouldn’t put so much faith in me.”

Nico looked at him, _properly_ looked. His eyes were clear and quiet, like a desert sky. His hair was messier than yesterday, duller. The blond seemed dirtier in this light, as if the roots were spreading down. His knees had scratches on them, like he was a kid who’d fallen off his bike, and it made his schoolboy freckles and messy mop seem all the more youthful.

Will was _young_ , which struck Nico but surprise. He was older than Nico, but Nico had always felt older anyway. 15 wasn’t old enough to have run military hospitals, have lives upon your shoulders. It was too young to have watched brothers die, it was too young to be running an impromptu therapy session because all your friends are too fucked in the head to go a peaceful night.

A fierce protection bubbled from somewhere, deep within. He caught Will’s eyes, gazed with concern, with anger.

And Will gazed back, his own emotions flickering like candlelight.

The moment broke, shattered, as the air began to shimmer, the sign of an oncoming Iris message.

“Ah, the other patients must be arriving,” Will stated, mysteriously. And, before Nico knew it, a familiar face was projected above their heads.

 

Nico’s jaw plummeted.

“Hey, Nico,” came a wavering- insecure?- voice.

“Percy?”

-

Will had begun the session with a disclaimer for all the other attendees who hadn’t already heard his self-doubt a million times already.

He was discussing medication and other options for dealing with nightmares, flashbacks and anxieties. Some were government approved, some were herbal, whipped up by satyrs with added nectar, for luck. There was mention of therapy dogs from some enthusiastic participants. Nico was just fixated on Percy.

Because, he’d spent all this time jacking Percy up as a hero, a god. He knew nobody was like that; the worship he’d left behind long ago, but still, some gap in his mind lingered. Percy was nothing like him. Percy was…yeah, he was Nico’s friend, but he was on another level. A level too high for this _mess_ of post-war living to even touch him.

Yeah, so, Nico’s foundations were a little shaken. Suddenly, he felt that little bit less bad about himself.

Because, look. Look at this roomful of people, who’d fought and survived wars against all odds. Who’d made it out the other end, and seen so much on the journey. Yeah, no wonder they were a little messed up, because souls were shattered and flawed.

Regardless, they prevailed. And Nico couldn’t help but be stunned at humanity’s resilience. To pick up the pieces. To go through hell and keep on living.

They would do it. These bright and hopeful faces would see the light again. Maybe they were caught in the shadow of war, but the people were still on rations before they could rock ‘n’ roll. Babies were born, and they’d forget. The world is different every time you open your eyes, and that’s what keeps it turning.

Will’s words were long gone; Nico was crushing his Capri-Sun. Because people are flawed. And maybe he had the tendency to look past that, to assume that everyone could deal with problems but himself.

Will. Will shook when he was scared. Will was insecure in his abilities as a medic, Will had lost brothers and patients and friends.

And Percy had been through hell, too. Percy had been hell’s protagonist. And Percy needed help, too.

Nico sat there, and felt. Felt protection, for these people. That were flawed. That were real. That were…all looking at him, expectantly.

“Um?”

Will laughed shortly at Nico’s lost expression. “We’re timetabling in one-to-ones to figure out the best treatment for individuals. I was asking if you were good for this afternoon.”

“Um, sure. Sorry.”

Will rewarded him with a warm smile. His eyes were tired, but his body seemed less tense and wound up; basically, he looked like he needed a nap.

Nico smiled back.

-

Cut to lunch, and Will and Nico were bickering.

“Listen, junk food is a very bad coping mechanism. It harbours addictive behaviour and clogs up your goddamn arteries.”

“Will. Listen, Will,” exclaimed Nico, gesturing wildly with his cheese toasty. “Have you ever cried into McDonald fries at midnight? Didn’t think so.”

They were on the Apollo table, minus most of Will’s siblings, who all had more interesting things to do than watch an argument. Only Austin remained, alongside one of his friends from Aphrodite. Lou Ellen was stacking food on Clovis’ motionless hair, as the latter drooled on the table. Jamie was munching noisily on some crisps, and Harry, the Nike boy from the infirmary, was tucking into a hotdog under Will’s watchful eye.

“But. Nico. Science. It’s a hit and run dose of endorphins. It’s like stimulants, or one night stands.”

“And, what’s wrong with that?” Nico felt a bit mean, but Will was just so _easy_ to provoke. Plus, anytime Will’s ears flushed, Jamie would pause his munching and grin knowingly.

“Stimulants and one night stands are the _life_ , Will,” Jamie piped up, from behind a shit-eating grin. He aimed a wink at Nico.

“Yeah, the point is, it’s bursts of chemical happiness. It’s not fulfilling. Stimulants don’t fulfil your need for long-lasting energy and high. One night stands don’t fulfil your need for need for intimacy.”

Harry opened his mouth, displaying the half-chewed meat. “What’s a one night stand?”

Under those wide and innocent eyes, Will flushed a fire truck, cranberry sort of colour. Nico giggled teasingly, prompting the blond to bombard him with a torrent of vegetables. “Harry,” said Will, not pausing his Nico attack. “Has anybody ever taught you about sex?”

Okay, now Nico was embarrassed, but Will seemed to have regained his composure. He was good at being the teacher, the older brother. “Yeah, it’s like, when…” Harry snickered. “When two people love each other veeeery muuuuuch….”

“Well, sometimes they don’t love each other at all. They might have never met before. They just do it for a night, for fun, then leave. That’s why it’s called a one night stand.”

“Oh. I thought…sex…was only if you really wanted kids or something. I didn’t know people did it for _fun_.” Harry looked thoroughly disgusted.

“Give it two years, kid,” muttered Jamie, “And you’ll start understanding.”

Nico picked a rainbow of raw pepper out of his hair. “How do you stay so chill around kids?” he hissed into Will’s ear.

Will grinned widely. “I love kids. And you gotta equip them with the best weapons possible. Knowledge is power. Nothing is taboo.”

“You’d make a good dad.”

“Yeah, I get that.” Will seemed distant. His eyes were soft when they skimmed over Harry, faraway.

Like a punch to the gut, Nico was overcome by a _feeling_. A swelling, a tug from somewhere in his gut that washed over him like a wave. Everything at once.

He couldn’t quite figure it out. It felt a bit like marvel. Marvel, that Will was Will, sitting beside him with a smile and a serenity and blue, blue eyes. And Nico was _glad_.

He existed. Will existed. They were alive.

Why did it seem so extraordinary? Being alive?

-

Nico was happy, an odd sort of feeling.

Yeah, he was decidedly unused to being so vulnerably joyful. But, no nightmares crowded his head and clamoured for attention, no ghosts lay in his path. Maybe he’d ran fast enough, escaped them, by defiantly living.

Until, something stopped him in his tracks.

He was just finishing off on the lava wall, body stark against the plastic as it tried to dislodge him, when he caught sight of a boy waiting for him at the bottom, waving with a bottle.

Nico made the last few metres and deactivated the lava, before abseiling down to greet the new arrival.

“Jamie. Hey.” He felt weirdly disappointed.

“Hi, Nico. Was passing by and thought you might appreciate a drink.” Nico took the bottle of cloudy lemonade with a grateful smile.

“You know, nectar tastes like cloudy lemonade. For me, I mean. It’s all warm and sunny and _perfect_ , in a way the bottled stuff can’t quite match.”

Nico looked at the sadness in Jamie’s eyes with curiosity. He knew nothing about Jamie, and his life, and his family. His feelings.

“They put too much sugar in store lemonade. It’s always far too sweet. You gotta make it yourself.” Nico was rambling.

Jamie smiled gently. “Yeah, that’s true. Nail the ratios.”

They stood in an uncomfortable silence as Nico sipped the lemonade. Jamie was looking at him, and he became suddenly conscious of the sweat that stuck him to his shirt.

“Anyway, Nico, I’ve also been meaning to ask you something.”

Nico hummed.

“Um, I know we don’t know each other very well, but, I think you’re…hot and sweet and I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date sometime?”

Nico’s jaw dropped. No, it plummeted, right to the floor, through the ground, and into his father’s throne room.

All of a sudden, his mouth a desert, and words couldn’t seem to form themselves. He looked at Jamie, his expectant, searching, dark eyes wide, his lip pulled into his mouth.

“I…um…I’m sorry, but, I like Will,” Nico blurted.

Jamie shrugged. “Yeah, I figured as much. Thought it was worth a shot. Good luck with golden boy, cutie.”

_WHAT THE FUCK_ , screamed his brain. _WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK_.

“I, uh, I need to go. See you at dinner.” And Nico was running, running, running, fast as his legs could carry him.

-

Nico was freaking out for precisely three reasons.

Firstly, a cute boy had asked him on a date.

Secondly, he had declined said cute boy.

Finally, his subconscious had just _done that_.

Nico was very accustomed to his subconscious hiding things from him. That was just how it was; when your mind is occupied by running, you have a tendency to ignore the clues as to your feelings. When you’re running for your life, there’s hardly enough time to actually _live_ it.

Never believe pop culture, you cannot afford to be human when you’re saving the world.

Then, suppressing becomes a habit. And your subconscious is a minefield. And…

_Wow_ , Nico thought. _What the fresh fuck_?

He could barely wrap his head around Jamie liking him. Yeah, okay, Jamie had almost definitely been flirting with him, but Nico was very dense, and a lot of things only made sense now, in hindsight.

See, things were clicking into place inside his dumb, dumb brain, but it had genuinely taken him by surprise. Jamie was pretty. Jamie had nice eyes, cute hair, perfect skin, a lean body. He was more than just pretty; he was _hot_.

Why did he like Nico? Why hadn’t Nico taken the chance?

Jamie was out of his league, surely? He was unlikely to get another opportunity like this. He should take it, run back to Jamie right now and say he’d changed his mind, say he’d love to go on a date and talk crap and laugh and kiss his pretty face.

But he didn’t. Because it didn’t feel right. And, above all else, Nico knew to trust his gut.

So, his trusty subconscious had formulated an excuse. Namely, another pretty boy.

Yeah, it wasn’t just his subconscious that’d noticed Will like that. Nico had eyes. And a dick. Will was _attractive_. 

And Nico definitely liked Will as a person too. Who wouldn’t? Will was kind and passionate and sweet and smart and strong, and Nico’s friend. But that didn’t mean anything, right? Nico knew plenty of hot people that weren’t dickheads (he was lucky like that). All of his friends were hot, which was kind of annoying, but the point was, he didn’t have crushes on any of _them_.

It meant nothing. It couldn’t mean anything. It must’ve just been the first face that popped to mind, just a matter of convenience, just crossing his brain, just a coincidence.

But, what had Jamie meant, he’d ‘figured’? Jamie _thought_ he had a crush on Will? Before Nico had said anything? Because that was one hell of a coincidence.

There must be another Nico. A sort of Jekyll and Hyde situation. He must have an evil twin, set on wreaking havoc and bringing about Nico’s untimely demise by making visible moon-eyes at Will. His subconscious had a _death wish_.

“Ugh,” he said, banging his head gently on a tree. This was gonna make things weird. His brain had just sprung this on him, and now it was gonna make things weird.

And who else to turn the corner into Nico’s cosy tree hiding place?

Nico had no idea how much control the gods had over circumstance. But, either way, someone in the sky was fucking cackling right now.

“Hey, Nico, I’ve been looking for you everywhere!”

Oh dear.

“We’ve got our one-to-one session, now, remember?” Will continued.

“Oh yeah.” Nico didn’t remember.

“Do you wanna stay here? I have stuff with me, so we can just continue in the woods, if you’d prefer.”

Nico closed his eyes and slowly slid to the ground, earning him an odd look from Will.

“I have a speech,” Will searched. He wanted a reply, but Nico was practically unresponsive. “I, like, came up with a speech, while I was looking for you. Do you want to hear it?”

Nico shrugged, eyes closed. He could hear as Will shifted from foot to foot, insecure, unsure. He cleared his throat.

“You run from things. Trauma, mourning, even companionship. The simple fact of war is that you don’t have time to process things; you become an emotionless shell if only to survive. And then, you come home, and all the horrors you’ve seen come back to haunt you.  
What you have to do is stop running. Let them all catch up with you, bowl you over. Confront them, and only then can you process them, and pick up the pieces. So that’s what I want you to do. Acknowledge what has happened to you. Stop supressing everything.”

Nico opened his eyes and regarded him curiously, because the words he spun, they made a tiny bit of sense. Maybe Will was smarter than everyone gave him credit. He got things.

That moment, Nico made the conscious decision to _try_ , because if anyone could do it, it was Will. He’d realised that, a short while ago.

Nico remembered the hope Will had given him last night. It was a beacon, it was something to fight for.

Maybe this still was war. Maybe the trick was, he needed something to fight for, and today he was fighting for himself, for his own future. For peace.

Because, he wasn’t afraid of peace. No, he knew that now. He was afraid of restlessness and the echoes of war, he was afraid of never being at peace with his past. He wanted peace. And damn if these conflicting feelings in his gut would get in his way.

So, with a nod to the irony, he _supressed_. He pushed that feeling Will gave him deep down, to deal with later. Probably.

His determination had a new lease of life. He turned to Will, and grinned. Defiantly.

“Let’s do this.”

-

The relocated to Nico’s cabin, since an irritated wood nymph had begun to flash them passive-aggressive glares from the branches. Will had thrown open all the windows, airing the musty room, and was spread-eagled on a coffin, having found it completely hilarious.

“Why don’t you get more beds?”

“I don’t need any more beds. It’s only me. And the vampires, obviously.”

Will gave him a sleepy smile, face smushed against the velvet pillow. “Okay. Have you finished your list yet?”

“No. Not yet.” Will lay back down on the vampire bed, wincing as his back clicked. Nico closed the notebook, jumping to the floor. “Hey,” he offered gently. “Those beds aren’t comfy. Come up here.”

Will groaned dramatically. “Leave me alone to my coffin. It’s where I _belong_.”

“Will, your father is the Sun God. I don’t think you’re a vampire.”

“Well, technically…”

“Shut up and save your poor spine.”

Nico went over to his second-hand CD player. He’d been given it by the Stoll brothers to decorate his newly built cabin, years ago; meaning it had probably been acquired illegally, but, it’s the thought that counts. They’d also given him some mixes of all sorts of music, as, to their horror, his musical knowledge back then mostly consisted of game themes from the Lotus Casino.

He’d collected more since, but he put on one of the old mixes, one of his favourite. A quiet lo-fi tune filled the room.

“You know, this mattress is so soft. I think I’m gonna fall asleep, this is dangerous.”

Nico hovered, unsure where to sit. Will’s eyes fluttered open. “Your CD collection is huge.”

“Every time I shadow travel somewhere, I pick up a CD. It’s a little tradition, I’ve got all sorts, and it helped me catch up with a lot of pop culture. Haven’t for a while, though.”

Will beckoned him up back to the bed, and he positioned himself awkwardly at the end, beside Will’s head. “I’ll take you CD shopping. Get back to your homework, Death Boy.”

Nico pictured a tiny version of himself jumping into his own body and pushing his feelings right back down his throat. “Don’t you want a pillow?”

“I’ll make do,” Will said, nestling his head into Nico’s lap and closing his eyes. Nico could feel his ears burning. “Right. Therapy. I was thinking of, like, getting a dog in? Or something. Dogs are…you okay with-“

He cut himself off with a colossal, cat-like yawn. It was cute. Okay. It was very cute. This was fine and Nico was definitely not freaking out.

Breathe. “You need some rest, Will. We can carry on the session later, just get some sleep, yeah?”

Eyes half lidded, Will smiled. “Get me the pillow, then.” Bossy.

Nico scooted over to grab it, Will whining at the loss of Nico’s comfy lap. Before Nico could try and awkwardly sit against the wall, he dragged him down along with the pillow until they were lying side-by-side.

“Finish your list.” Will had asked Nico to draw out the most significant events since he’d arrived at Camp Half-Blood, so they could gauge, together, the meanings and feelings behind Nico’s nightmares and anxieties.

“I’m basically done.”

“Mmkay. Let me see.” Will’s eyes were still tired, glancing across Nico’s words.

“Will. You’re too tired for this.”

“Yeah. Well, we’re starting with this.” Out of his pocketed jacket, Will produced a post-it note and a felt tip. He chose a hot pink one, scribbled, and stuck it on the ceiling.

“It’s a reminder.” The song changed, something fuzzy and new wave. “What’s this CD?”

“It’s just called Garage. I don’t know, I like it.”

“I like it too.” Will let Nico’s list fall with his hand, and turned to meet Nico’s eyes. “Have you got over Bianca’s death?”

Well, take note kids. That’s how to one-eighty a conversation.

What really took Nico by surprise, though, was Will saying her name. Not, ‘your sister’. Not the elusive and faceless tragedy of Camp Half-Blood. Bianca.

“Yeah. I think I have.” And Nico was being honest.

“Okay.”

Something about the silence, the darkness in Will’s eyes, made Nico double-take.

“What about you? Michael, and Lee?” At the question, Will let his head drop, defeated.

“How do you know about them? Thought you spent the wars being a lone wolf.” A pillow covered his face, but the muffled tone seemed bitter, somewhat.

Nico prised the pillow from his grip and forced blue eyes to meet his own. “I buried them, Will.”

He tried to look away, but Nico’s gaze was unwavering. The dimness of the room, the old music, the small bunk, Will’s shampoo, all made Nico feel far away from the ground. Like Will and him had escaped reality, momentarily.

So it didn’t surprise him when Will opened his mouth, and uncharacteristic words came tumbling out.

“I feel stupid for missing them. I barely knew them, and anyway, it was years ago. But, when you have an older brother, when they’re your _leader_ , you think that they’re invincible. And then, one day, they’re not. And I know it’s dumb-“

“Will. It’s not…it’s not dumb.”

“Yeah I know, but, it’s not, like, even a big deal compared to the shit so many other demigods have been through. Everybody’s lost a sibling, been through hell. I feel stupid talking to _you_ of all people about it. You’ve had it tougher than anyone I’ve ever met. I should….I should forget it.”

“Look, Will, I can’t weave words like you. But just know that I understand. And, yeah, I’ve been dealt some shit hands. But that doesn’t mean anything you feel is stupid. It’s the opposite.”

Will looked unconvinced, but Nico nudged him. Maybe it was the darkness, the music, the distance from the rest of camp. Maybe it was Nico. Either way, Will continued.

“It felt like I’d been thrown out in the deep end, after the Battle of Manhattan. Maybe, then, I actually grew up. I’d seen people die, been unable to save them, and they just expected me to go back to camp and _lead_ this bunch of kids, raise them to fight in another stupid fucking war…” 

Will’s chest rose and fell. Nico reached out and held him, only just, only gently. “You know how the Hephaestus cabin counsellors were cursed or whatever before Leo? I thought, maybe Apollo was too. We’d lost our counsellors to two separate battles, and, especially what with Dad and the prophecy thing being _useless_. So, chances were, by the time the next battle swung round, I’d die. But…I didn’t.”

He couldn’t quite tell, but it looked like Will was crying.

So, Nico’s grip tightened, until Will was all out of silent tears.

“Sorry,” Will said flatly.

“Don’t be.” Nico became acutely aware of the way his arms were tangled around Will, so he retracted them, painstakingly slow, and crossed them on his chest awkwardly.

Now, his CD player was playing a thrashy punk tune, notes all deliciously stark against the stillness of the cabin. Nico smiled subconsciously at the familiarity, and he could feel Will’s gaze like sunshine on his face.

“I don’t want to move,” moaned Will, as if the spell had been broken.

Nico didn’t want that. He liked to pretend nothing else existed, so he said “You don’t have to.”

“No?”

“Get some rest, Will. This song’s my favourite, anyway.”

Will gratefully snuggled into the soft nest of blankets, eyes fluttering shut. “Thank you, Nico. Everyone says you’re bad with people, but I think you just prefer to listen, anyway.”

Nico exhaled slightly, smiling. He couldn’t believe he’d managed to supress his epiphany enough to actually provide genuine comfort to the subject of his struggle.

“And maybe Apollo is cursed. Sometimes, I think I would’ve died, when we were scouting the Roman camp, but you saved me.”

As Will slept beside him, he looked up at the ceiling, to the pink post-it Will had scrawled on earlier. It read, “Think More.”

-

Nico had thought more. And thought, and thought, and fallen asleep.

He woke to find the softest Will-shaped indent beside him, and a torn-out notebook page on the pillow, and no Will. Okay.

The paper began with a note from Will:  
 _To my favourite vampire, I had to leave for doctor duty and I didn’t want to wake you. My siblings are a mess without me, so naps are often compromised.  
Thank you for the last few hours. I feel bad, because I was supposed to be helping you, but I did really need that.  
You’re a good friend. And you’ve got a comfy bunk. Sometimes I need a grumpy emo to call out my bullshit and force me to rest. On his comfy bunk. Seriously, where did you get that mattress?  
I’ll see you at dinner. In the meantime, I’ve composed a list below of little missions with reference to the list you wrote for me.  
Good luck on your quest, young hero!  
Will xx  
(P.S. You snore. Cutie) _

The words were punctuated with tiny doodles, which Nico thought was just about the sweetest thing he’d ever seen.

Nico set down the note and shook his head. Cute. Will had called him (and his snoring, dammit) cute. And, he’d doodled a tiny heart next to the word.

Nico fixated on it, trying not to scream.

The rest he skimmed through, all small, sometimes cute tasks that he could build on towards acceptance, and avoiding further nightmares. One was, talk to Clovis. Keep a dream journal. Go back to where he summoned Minos. Go back to Bianca’s grave. Visit his father, and the Underworld. Stay in Camp Jupiter on the exchange. Apologise to Percy. Read up on Tartarus. Punch a pomegranate. …Apologise to Percy. 

It looked like Will had, systematically, gone over Nico’s recount of events accordingly. There were gaps, too, where Nico’s words had been especially vague (-??No clue what Creepy Beanbag Monsters means. -Kiss??? Who did you kiss??? Patient confidentiality, okay. -How did you manage to drop Percy and Annabeth into Tartarus??)

Nico checked for one, but sure enough, there was just a gap, the name ‘Cupid’, and several question marks. Will needed to calm it with the punctuation.

Filled with resolve, Nico fished a ‘monster-proof’ iPod from under the mattress, and Face-timed Piper before he could think twice.

“Nico!” said Piper between a mouthful of beanburger. She was clearly travelling, complete with the sunglasses, earbuds and tired eyes. “How are you?”

Before Nico could reply, Jason leant into frame. “Who’s that? Nico? Nice bedhead, man. Seriously too lazy to make the ten metres to the Iris cabin?”

“Shut it, Grace. I don’t have any drachmas, and anyway, modern tech is growing on me.”

“Whatever, grandpa.” Jason pushed his headphones back on and disappeared.

“Idiot,” Piper hissed at Nico, as she simpered at her boyfriend.

Nico laughed, nervously. “Hey, I wanted to talk to you.”

Piper’s expression was instantly dead serious. “Okay. I’m all ears.”

Nico breathed. In. Out. “A boy asked me on a date. I also realised I like a boy. Another boy. Unfortunately. Like like a boy. I mean. Like, I wanna go on dates and hold hands. With a boy. The boy. The second one. Not the one who asked me out. Have I mentioned I’m gay?”

Beat. Piper burst out laughing.

Nico sat there, bemused. Not what he was expecting. Apparently, he was really, really shit at reading people.

Piper wiped tears from her eyes. “Oh my gods, Nico, you’re a MESS!”

He scratched his neck. “Yeah. Alright. Don’t rub it in.”

“I’m sorry.” Piper was shaking her head, visibly supressing her laughter. “I’m sorry, but that’s the funniest coming out I’ve ever witnessed.”

“What other gays have been coming out to you?”

Piper winked. “We’re Greek. I’m a daughter of Aphrodite. Don’t worry, you’re my favourite gay.”

“Thanks, Piper,” he grumbled. “Well, you win funniest reaction to me coming out. It’s heart-warming, really, to know that my pain brings you amusement.”

“Oh, sweetie, I _knew_ you were gay.”

“Jason told you?”

“No, of course not, my gaydar is just- wait a second. Jason knew? You told Jason? BEFORE ME?”

Nico grimaced. “It was completely an accident. I was kinda yanked out of the closet, and all. Like, I had to confess about my crush on Percy.” Piper swerved the camera so Nico could watch as she punched a dozing Jason.

“If he hurt you…”

“It’s nothing like that.”

“Hey, Pipes, why’d ya hit me?” Jason was clearly offended, blinking at her sleepily. Piper’s pursed lips softened for a moment as she plainly and unashamedly watched him, and Nico wished he had someone he could stare at without worrying what anybody else would think.

“Percy, huh? Didn’t see that coming. How did I not see that coming?”

“By the time you guys rescued me, I was over the worst of it. Like, it was mostly a kid thing. Anyway, I was back like ten minutes and Percy went and bloody fell into Tartarus, so it’s not like you’d see me checking out his butt or something.”

“Well, fair play. It’s a good butt.”

“It’s just a rule. I check out Percy’s butt. You check out Percy’s butt. The praetor of New Rome checks out Percy’s butt.”

“The Oracle of Delphi checks out Percy’s butt.”

Jason squinted through his glasses. “Percy’s butt? What?”

Piper’s eyes glittered with mirth and they both burst out laughing. “Jason not only checks out but takes an avid interest in any mention of Percy’s butt.”

“Bi-curious!” sung Piper.

“That butt, well, it could make anybody question their sexuality. Thank Zeus I had its majesty to guide me through my twelve-year-old identity crisis.”

“Damn right, worthy of the gods. Apollo checks it out. Aphrodite checks it out.”

“Hades and I have lengthy discussions over brunch about it.”

“Annabeth not only checks it out but engages with it-“

“Eeeewwww! Wait. Tell me more.”

Piper wheezed.

Jason, lip stuck out, nudged her. “Pipes? What are you talking about?”

“Percy’s butt. Sexuality and emotion.” A pause for thought. “Mostly Percy’s butt.”

“Percy’s butt is both sexuality and emotion,” said Nico duly.

Piper buried her head in Jason’s shoulder, shaking with laughter.

“You guys might wanna finish your conversation soon, because some lady back there is glaring at us. She’s scary. Bloody Hades, I hope she’s not a monster.”

“Run a sword through her just in case.” Jason rolled his eyes.

“Sorry for disturbing you and all, I can go if you need.”

“Nope. Not until I hear EVERYTHING. You gonna give me names or should we call them Thing One and Thing Two?”

“No, it’s fine, I don’t mind telling you.”

Piper tucked her knees under her chin, rewarding him with a shit-eating grin. She was wearing a mulberry lipstick today. “So, Nico, who do you liiiike?”

“You’re jumping ahead here.”

“Sorry.” Piper shoved the last of her burger in her mouth, leaving a smudge of ketchup. “Go on.”

“So, I’d just climbed up the lava wall, and Jamie from Demeter came up to me.” Piper raised her eyebrows. “He gave me some cloudy lemonade and asked me out on a date.”

“And you didn’t go on a date with him?”

“No.”

Piper took a moment to consider this. “I’m kind of glad you said no. Jamie has…I don’t know. He’s a nice guy, fun to be around, but he’s pretty destructive. He told me about his deadbeat dad-“

“Well, my dad’s king of deadbeats. Literally.”

“-and he doesn’t deal well with his problems.”

“Sounds like we’d get on great.”

Piper smiled sadly. “Seriously, Nico. You’d make each other worse.”

Yeah. Yeah, Piper was right. “I guess. Well, he’s sweet and cute and all, but…”

“But?”

“Percy’s butt.” Piper giggled, but she gave Nico a look.

“Just spit it out. You’ll feel better for it.”

Nico was brave. In and out, in and out. He thought of his and Will’s exchange this evening, and what it meant. He thought about getting better and taking control and _not running_. This was Nico di Angelo. He wasn’t just brave, but fearless.

In and out.

“I like Will.” She was right. That felt good. Oh, gods, that felt _so good_. “I like Will!” He announced, proud. “I like Will and his face and his smile! I like Will and want to hold his hand and kiss him!”

All of a sudden, the dark pressure in his gut was released, and, like a spring, his joy resonated throughout his body. He felt light, so light, he’d swallowed a teaspoon of sunshine. He grinned, with the giddiness of it.

Because it was special.

Piper was smiling. “Awww! Your face. You look _happy_ , dammit.”

“It…I don’t know. It feels nice to say.”

“Bless you. You’re so cute.”

“Shut it, McLean.”

“Hey, uh, can I tell Jason?”

“Tell me what?” said Jason.

“Yeah. I mean, fuck it, he’ll find out anyway.”

Piper nudged her boyfriend. “Hey, Jason, is Will Solace cute?”

“Yeah? I mean. I dunno. Leo said he was.”

“Leo has a fine taste in boys. That’s fair.”

“Did Will finally ask out Nico?”

“Whoa.” Said Nico. “Wait. What? What does he mean by finally?”

“You made Nico all flustered, babe.”

“Piper. What is he talking about?”

Piper laughed, loud. “Anyway. We better be going. Things to do. Demigods to find. Seriously, that woman’s getting creepy, the working theory is that she’s a harpy.”

“Evasive technique. Impressive. This is not over.”

Piper gave him a wink. “Catch ya later, di Angelo.”

Nico stretched, rolling onto his back. He gave her the smallest of smiles. A lot had happened today.

“Thank you, Piper. Like, I know we don’t know each other all too well, but, that just meant quite a lot to me. Thank you for listening, I guess.”

“Hey. It was no problem. Thank you for the honesty. And, should you ever need to pour your heart out, in bed to a phone screen is always the best.” She smiled, right back at him. “Night, Nico.”

“Night, Piper. Safe flight.”

“Worst comes to worst, Jason’ll probably catch me.” The screen dulled as she hung up, leaving Nico alone again.

He let his iPod fall to his chest and closed his eyes. Out came a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding.

There was no denying the churn, the easy fire of his gut. But, it burnt less abruptly, now. His skin did not feel alive with anxiety.

This day had been tumultuous. But, he was wiser for it, and, maybe this was the shock talking, but he felt like things were looking toward the sky.

Life is difficult. That’s no goddamn secret, living was incredibly hard, and maybe it’d be easier to dissolve back into the shadows he was born of. The Underworld was already full of jewels.

But he’d picked this battle, and he was going to stick at it, too. Fight for a better kingdom of the living.

For the beautiful things, the trees and the rivers, the laughter of friends who care more than you initially thought. For possibility and nighttime adventures, for the dreams of fools. For people who lie beside you and listen to your music and tell you, it may take a long time, but things, they’ll get better for us.

Fight for peace, fight for life; and for times like these where you felt an inexplicable smile grace your lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading, you lovely little shit. hope it was okay!!!
> 
> have a fine day, pal. I hope you are well.

**Author's Note:**

> cheerz for reading! i hope you liked it!
> 
> Have a good 'un!!!


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